The Power of Prayer
- Theresa Crawford
- 19 hours ago
- 6 min read
The time stamp for the last time I edited this blog post says February 27th, 5pm. That’s the last time I sat down to work on my blog. I had little motivation to do it then, but I wanted to get it done before the month of Immersion Groups and my own traveling.
That did not happen. It seems that every moment since 5pm on February 27th has been full of something. And if something hasn’t actually been happening in the moment, I’ve felt emotionally or physically incapable of sitting down and writing about life here.
However, looking back on what I already had in my post, I can see that Jesus was providential in what I originally wrote. He knew the same lesson He started teaching me two months ago would always be important for me to continue learning. Here it is below(is it weird to quote yourself in a blog???)
“I sat down to pray in a chair outside at our retreat center in Sangrelaya. It was Wednesday, the silent day of our January Missionary Retreat. From my chair, placed in front of the room I shared with the other female missionaries, I could see various coconut trees and other plants, and over top of all of them, the 40??? foot cross that stands in the middle of the retreat center. As I sat there, gazing upon the cross, the words of Fr. Matt Kuczora came to me, from a video reflection we had watched earlier in the retreat. “Behold the cross, our only hope” – the motto of the Holy Cross Order. I didn’t truly feel the energy to write this blog, but the words “the power of prayer” have been playing nonstop in my head whenever I go to prayer.”
I’ve seen in the past months that there is truly one thing I can do that is most powerful for the people here: pray. And not just say prayers but believe and trust in the power of prayer. I’ve witnessed the power of prayer while here, and more so, seen the need for prayer and faith.
Moments from the retreat
Healing at the Cross
As I looked upon the cross during the retreat, reflecting on the words of Fr. Matt, I thought about everything that was yet to come in the year. Aware that the year would hold plenty of challenges and heartbreak, I asked myself if I’d be able to place my hope in the cross, if I would have the faith to lay my pain at the foot of the cross and trust in the Resurrection. This faith I saw represented in one of our girls during Lent, while praying the Stations of the Cross as a community.
This girl arrived in November with two of her brothers. Since her arrival, she has noticeably struggled with several things in the Finca. Two of her biggest struggles have been making sense of her new reality away from her family and feeling comfortable in the Catholic church and with Jesus. She had often told me that saying prayers in our spiritual events made her feel nervous and scared. While walking around the Finca, praying the Stations, she would hardly participate in the prayers or singing, but she would always stand right next to the person carrying the cross and the image of the Station. Now, there could be many reasons why she’d stand there every time. But I see beauty in the fact that, despite feeling uncomfortable and out of place here, especially in the church, she chose to stand at the cross. She chose to be physically close to Jesus in His Passon, while she walked through her own suffering. On some level, she knew she was safe and loved there.
I’m happy to say this girl has come a long way in feeling comfortable in the church. Today she even read the Psalm during Communion Service. =)
Do I have that inherent trust in Jesus? Do I rest in His open arms when I’m confused, struggling, or scared? There is so much – like so much – out of my control at the Finca. So many things that scare me or make me angry and sad and heartbroken. This girl showed me how constantly showing up at the foot of the cross, allowing myself to be bathed in His blood and water, despite the fear and heartbreak leads to healing, love, and peace.
The Face of Jesus
One thing I have asked of Jesus more than anything has been to show me His face in the faces of the people here, that I may love who He sent me to serve with a heart like His. Through the His power in prayer, Jesus has shown himself so clearly and has filled me with joy by encountering Him in His people. I want to share some of the ways I’ve seen the face of Jesus in my loved ones here.
The small kids become distracted during Stations of the Cross and start playing in the sand. Instead of calling their attention to the prayer service, Jesus asks me to ponder when he wrote in the sand.
I see one of our security guards and his wife with their newborn baby, in their own world, adoring each other, and in that moment, I see more clearly than ever the Holy Family.
Doña Fina caring and playing with her grandchildren, practically raising them, even after raising so many children of her own. She does it all with love and joy.
My dear friend G shares about her fierce love for her daughters and her desire to protect them, while also sharing in the hardships of life here. She invites me to celebrate her daughter’s First Communion with them – an incredibly special occasion and I feel incredibly honored.
Teddy and I go to the river with a family we’re friends with. They are incredibly poor but still invite us over frequently to eat with them. We spend the morning essentially playing water polo with their youngest son, while the mom and dad sit together and enjoy each other’s company. The moment is full of love and joy.
Back to my (coffee) roots
I’d be remised I didn’t write a bit about my trip to Copan that I had been looking forward to all year! Dulce Nombre, Copan was the first place I ever visited in Honduras, two years ago on an immersion trip with St. Thomas Aquinas Student Center and Parish. On that trip, I fell in love with Honduras and it led me to ultimately deciding to come to the Finca. On vacation last summer, I had the opportunity to meet up with Mooney, who leads the trips and is president of the Coffee organization that works with coffee farmers in Copan, and he invited me to join them on the immersion trip this year!
Unfortunately, I contracted dengue(for the second time) a few days before leaving, so there was a bit of a risk of not even going on the trip! Luckily, I felt a lot better while on the trip, with the only side effect being the loss of my voice for the week(God was really encouraging me to listen, not talk).
The week was wonderful. As was the case two years ago, my highlight was the days spent in El Zapote visiting a small community of coffee farmers. These farmers are a part of a cooperative that sells coffee directly to the organization in Ames, Café El Zapote. It’s a very close-knit community and they have a great friendship with Mooney and the rest of the gringos that come to visit each year.
This year, I felt really blessed to be able to communicate more comfortably with them than I could last time, before I could speak Spanish very well. I loved being able to chat with the farmers, their wives, the kids and understand more fully the whole coffee production process, as they explained it. I remember walking in my host family’s house the first night, nervous to spend time with them, then quickly realized chatting with them was the same as chatting with my friends in Mojoguay – I felt right at home! I also had the opportunity to see my good friend Milly who lives in Dulce Nombre and translates for the groups. She’s getting married soon and moving to the States, so please pray for her in her transition!
It was wonderful to be back in the same place where I first felt serious about my call to the Finca. As we rode in the trucks through the coffee-covered mountains, I thought back to driving through the same mountains two years earlier questioning, “Could I ever live in this country?”. While back as a resident of this country, I walked through the towns that now seemed familiar to me and wondered at how I could have ever considered something different. I felt an affirmation and peace there in Dulce Nombre, a connection to family, and a sense of being home. I’ll forever be blessed and grateful to have the people and places in Copan in my heart and in my life.
God is moving hearts and souls here! Hopefully you can see the joy of Finca life in these photos! Please continue to pray for everyone here at the Finca, that we always trust in the will of the Lord and can feel His healing love.
Holy Week
General Finca Shenanigans
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